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Thank You Stephenie Meyer

March 30th, 2009

With the recent rash of some men being dumped because their significant other wanted someone who is more like Edward, the teen vampire from Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight series, I figured Stephenie Meyer might be providing a little insight to an age old question men have been asking. You know, this one:

What do women want in a man?

It is only natural to assume that since these women dumped their boyfriends because they wanted someone like Edward that they, indeed, want someone like Edward. So, men, let’s review what this group of women want out of you. Sooo, what is Edward to his damsel? Well let us list.

  • He is part of wealthy, powerful family. So wealth and power, check.
  • He is seventeen and a stud, forever. Forever young and studly, check.
  • He is immortal. Immortality…that’s a tough one…check
  • He lives off of the blood of living things. Blood sucker, check
  • He is super powered. Super speed and strength, looks like you should hit the weight room….check
  • He can read minds. Hmmm…check
  • Destiny has set him up in such way that his female partner to be is the complete answer to everything he can possibly do, making them undeniably linked for each other. Destiny, check.

So, there you have it. If you want to be with these women all you need to be is wealthy, immortal, super powered, and have fate put you two together in such a powerful way that neither of you can deny it from the moment you see each other. Come on guys, that is not too much to ask for. Special thanks to Stephenie Meyer for clearing this up.

And on a final note I would like to say that this is not all women; just those who dumped their boyfriends/husbands for “their Edward”. I have found that most people I know here on Krypton actually know the difference between fantasy and reality.

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The Watchmen…The End is…Argh, PUT IT AWAY MAN.

March 8th, 2009

Honestly, I do want to try to keep this blog tech related but, I felt utterly compelled to post this review of my recent viewing of The Watchmen.  When a co-worker showed me the preview to this months ago, I was floored.  A great story done by the same person who did 300, which is one of my favorite movies in recent years.  This was a definite first weekend watch. Well, it is now the first weekend so let’s see how it really was.

The Good
The story line is great.  If you have read the graphic novel, you know this.  And, towards the middle to the end of this movie it actually shows up and you start to see why this is so great.  The acting, while nothing close to Oscar worthy, is capable.   There is some decent gore, if you like that, which of course I do.  Lastly, the music is good, it is classic rock and some really good selections at that.

The Bad
Similar to Peter Jackson’s King Kong, this movie is too long with too much attention being paid to too many things that could have been left out.  Yeah, stay true to the story but, seriously it is a movie.  Make it a good movie experience.  In a movie with a story this good I should never find myself bored silly, which I did numerous times in this three hour zinger.   Also, every five minutes you are presented with a nice shot of the d**k of Dr. Manhatten.  I understand clothing is irrelevant to him but, I want to be entertained and I do not want to spend three hours staring at a CGI p***is.  I just don’t, it is COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY.

The music, while good music if the songs are listened to standalone, was completely out of place and seemed to wander in out of nowhere and catch you by surprise in moments that left you going “WTF????”

The Ugly
Three hours staring at a CGI schlong.  I don’t want to harp on this but, it was beyond distracting and pretty much ruined the movie.

Conclusion
The Watchmen had so much promise but, left it completely unfufilled and overall I did not enjoy the movie nearly one iota as much as I thought I would. Maybe I was expecting too much but,  I won’t even rent it from Netflix when it comes out to be honest, which says a lot because I really try to pull the good out of every movie I watch because I love them so much.

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